dream of edward

The Church

Whoa
I ve-I fell asleep for a while. I couldn t help it
I ve been pushing myself to the end even faster
taking fewer breaks
I dreamt while I slept
Edward was in my dream
Neither of us had really ever left the insane asylum
We just sat there in matching straitjackets in
uncomfortable chairs, facing each other
We were surrounded by huge orange-red-and-black mushrooms
The sight of their amber gills above us
slowly breathing in and out in a sussurating
mimicry of conscious life
was strangely calming to me
Where have you gone? I asked him
Underground, he said
What did you find there? I asked
Acceptance, everlasting life, and mushrooms
he said, and smiled
It was a lovely smile
It radiated outwards to suffuse his
entire face in a golden light
Is that all? I said. Was it worth it?
Did you have to give up anything?
My fear. My consciousness. My former life.
What was that like?
Do you remember those trust exercises they made us do?
Where one of us would fall into the arms of the others
and you just had to fall and keep falling
and believe they would catch you?
It was like that?
It was like that. Except imagine falling for a
hundred years before you re caught
looking at a black sky full of dead stars in front of you
and the abyss at your back.
You re dead, I said
It wasn t an accusation
Probably, he replied