MELHORES MÚSICAS / MAIS TOCADAS
tenacious d - 39
She's 39, but she still looks young
Not very young, but a lot of fun
She's my 39 lady in the sun
49 and I'm feelin' fine
In the sun that's a lot of fun
Drinkin' mai tais, kickin' back with my flip-flops on
I'm wearin' socks and my toe is tight
I think about her every damn night
39 year-old lady, she looks pretty good to me
I'm 49, drinkin' white wine
Not goin' out with no 19 year-old chickities no more
From now on I got my 39 year-old whore
Oh!
Don't you call her a whore
I'll fuckin' tear your esophagus out
She's sweet and she's getting old
And she's mine, to have and to hold
She needs a dentist appointment quick
I pay for it and she sucka my dick
When we text each other, I fiddle with my anus
I stick the finger in it!
Then I fuckin' didariddly doo
And I fuckin' gots to spew
Upon my belly, dripped upon my shoe
Get me a tissue
Chardonnay in the setting sun
She's 39, but she's number one
Get the apartment just right, she's comin' over tonight
I like it cause I don't feel scared
She's 39, I'm in my underwear
Here she comes, comin' down the hallway
She's knockin' on my door!
I open the door
There she is, not too bad, good enough
39 year-old lady, young enough for me
Boobies droopin', but she's good enough for me
Trimmed her pussy hairs, good enough for me
Mature woman, she's my lady
Uh huh, uh huh, ooh yeah
She ain't gonna be fuckin' around with no other guys
Nanananah-nah, she's mine, she's my special lady
Special lady
We can see a fuckin' movie
And agree it's a total piece of shit
Comfortable shoes, never lose
We can fuckin' talk about some things
She don't need no diamond rings
She don't need no diamond rings.
tenacious d - 5 needs
First you need the planet
Earth beneath your feet
You couldn't live an instant without that
Then you need the air
Oxygen to breathe
You couldn't live five minutes without that
Then you need the water
The icy cold water
Now, You need some love (love)
You need some love (love)
We only wanted to rock your world
(only wanted to rock your world ??)
The fifth need is to rock your world
(don't forget about the fifth need)
It comes before food!
Aaaahh, ooooweeooo-hooo, aaaah
tenacious d - baby
I can't get to sleep tonight
No matter how hard I try
Cause it's cold and it's dark
And the wind is a whistlin'
And I can't seem to put out the light
Momma's been searching for baby
But baby been tryin' to get home
Cause it's cold and it's dark
And the moon cannot light the way
And Daddy's gone - (bye bye)
I'm just a babyyyyy
(crying)
tenacious d - beelzeboss
Beelzeboss:
I am complete!
Tenacious d:
(both) fuuuck
Beelzeboss:
Yes, you are fucked,
Shit out of luck!
Now i'm complete and my cock you will suck!
This world will be mine,
And your first in line!
You brought me the pick and now you shall both die!
Tenacious d:
(jb) waaait waaait waaait you motherfucker
We challenge you to a rock off,
(both) give us one chance to rock your socks off
Beelzeboss:
Fuck! fuck!
Fuuuck, the demon code prevents me
From declining a rock off challenge!
What are your terms?
What's the caatch?
Tenacious d:
(jb) if we win,
You must take your sorry ass back to hell
And also you will have to pay our rent
Beelzeboss:
And what if i win?
Tenacious d:
(jb) then you can take kage back to hell..
(kg) what!?
(jb) trust me kage it's the only way
(kg) what the fuck are you talkin about?
(jb) to be your little bitch
Beelzeboss:
Fine!
Let the rock off begin hahaha!
I'm the devil,
I love metal!
Check this riff,
It's fuckin' tasty!
I'm the devil i can do what i want
Whatever i've got i'm gonna flaunt!
There's never been a rock off that i've ever lost!
I can't wait to take kage back to hell
I'm gonna fill him with my hot demon gel!
I'll make him squeal like the scarlet pimpernel!!
Tenacious d:
(jb) noooo! c'mon kage, let's fight him music with our music.
(kg) there's just no way that we can win, that was a masterpiece
(jb) listen to me-
(kg) he rocks to hard because he's not a mortal man
(jb) god dammit kage,
He gonna make you his sex slave,
Your gonna gargle mayonnaise
(kg) noo
(jb)Unless we bust a massive monster mama jam
(kg) dude,
We've been through so much shit
(jb) de-activated lasers with my dick
(both) now it's time to blow this fucker down
(jb) c'mon kage now it's time to blow doors down
(kg) i hear you jables now it's time to blow doors down
(jb) light up the stage cuz its time for a showdown
(kg) we'll bend you over then we'll take ya to brown town
(both) now we've got to blow this fucker down
(kg) he's gonna rape me if we do not blow doors down
(jb) c'mon kage cuz it's time to blow doors down
(kg) ooooooh and who'll piledrive ya, it's time for the black out
(jb) hey antichrist ah, beelzeboss,
We know your weakness, ah rockin socks!
We rock the casbah, and blow your mind
We will defeat you, for all mankind
You hold the sceptor,
We hold the key
You are the devil,
We are the D
(both) we are the D (x16)
Beelzeboss:
You guys are fuckin lame! come on kage, you're comin with me
Taste my lightning suckers!
Tenacious d:
(jb) noooo!
Beelzeboss:
Ow, fuck!
My fuckin horn!
Ohh no
Tenacious d:
(jb) from whence you came you shall remain,
Until you are complete again
Beelzeboss:
Nooooo!
Fuck you kage and fuck you jables
I'll get you tenacious d!!
tenacious d - break in-city
JB:
The mission is clear,
i'm going over there
I'm going to do the mission
I flip around the corner,
flat as a pancake
And then i- aww noo! A camera
Stay back here,
devise a plan
Dive into the bushes
(Chorus)
Against all odds
Infiltrate,
storm the gates!
storm the gates!
Ninja style,
samuri (Storm the gates!)
Metal pole,
climb that shit (Storm the gates)
Climb into that mother-fucker
Now i'm climbin up,
up on the roof
I got cat-like reflexes
(Chorus)
Against all odds
Infiltrate,
oh! storm the gates!
Two air-vents on the roof,
thats what the guy was talkin a- Shit!
(Chorus)
Electric Eye
Infiltrate,
storm the gates!
storm the gates!
storm the gates!
tenacious d - car chase city
Car chase city, that's the name of the game.
It was all proven, it was totally lame.
KG really fuckin' blew us a mess.
Now we're fuckin' headed for a total KAPOW.
Car chase city rollin' with my bud.
Not that it wasn't, but it totally was.
Car chase city, no more rough on the map!
Car chase city, now I'm takin' a crap!
Now it's gettin' heresy, we're shakin' the key!
Never underestimate the power of D!
KG fuckin' put his foot on the gas!
If I go to prison, hide the pick in my ass!
Fuck this shit, it's gone too far!
Kage pull over let me outta the car!
Car chase city, now we're takin' the lane!
JB blew in now we're never the same!
Let's rock, let's roll.
Live it friend I'm feelin' ya.
WHOA!
Let's rock, let's roll.
Car chase city patrol.
Car chase city. [x3]
Let's rock, let's roll.
Car chase city patrol!
Let's rock, let's roll.
Just a fuckin' pick it and roll.
Picks! Speed! Turbo!
Oh! Fuck! Gas! Brakes!
Spinnin' Donut! The Spinnin' Donut!
Roll! Flip It! Gas! Nitro!
Go!
Let's rock, let's roll.
Car chase city patrol!
Let's rock, let's roll.
Just a fuckin' pick it and roll.
Let's rock, let's roll.
Car chase city patrol!
Let's rock, let's roll.
Rockin' will see you from a fool.
Car chase city [x3] (to fade out)
Devil: Hey guys, you're runnin' a little late.
There's one spot left.
You got any new material?
Jables: What we got's gonna turn your brain into shit.
Kage: Dust off the stage open mic host. Step aside.
tenacious d - city hall
All you people up there in City Hall,
You're fuckin' it up for the people that's in the streets.
This is a song for the people in the streets,
Not the people City Hall.
All you motherfuckers in the streets it's time to rise up, up up up
Come along children and fuckin' rise!
Lots of times when me and KG are watchin'
All the fuckin' shit that goes down at City Hall,
We get the feeling we should fuck shit up,
Yeah we should fuckin' start a riot.
A Riot!
We have 'em screaming in the streets,
we have 'em tippin' over shit and breakin' fuckin' windows of small businesses,
and settin' fuckin' fires!
and settin' fuckin' fires!
and settin' fuckin' fires!
[spoken]
And then after the smoke is cleared,
and the rubble has been swept away,
me and KG will peek out our heads.
We've been watching the riots on a monitor twenty floors below sea level,
from a bunker.
We did it Rage-Kage, we beat the bastards of City Hall!
[laughs] But now what will we do?
We must rebuild. But who will lead us in the rebuilding process?
Man, it's got to be someone with the know-how
and the elbow grease to lead us to a new land.
No, not me and KG, we don't have the cognitive capacity to lead...
Alright, we'll do it!
[sung]
We'll lead as Two Kings,
We'll lead as Two Kings.
Ahhhaaa (Two Kings, we'll lead as Two Kings)
Ah-ha ah-how,
We'll lead as Two Kings.
[spoken]
The first decree is to legalize marijuana.
The tyranny and the bullshit's gone on too long.
You old fuckin' shrivs who blocked it's legalization,
you're banished from the land!
[sung]
We'll lead as Two Kings,
We'll lead as Two Kings.
Ahhhaaa (Two Kings, we'll lead as Two Kings)
Ah-ha ah-how,
Lead as Two Kings.
[spoken]
The second decree: no more pollution, no more car exhaust,
or ocean dumpage. From now on, we will travel in tubes!
[sung]
We'll lead as Two Kings, oh, yeah,
We'll fuckin' lead as Two Kings.
[spoken]
Get the scientists working on the tube technology, immediately.
(Tube technology.) Chop, chop, let's go.
[spoken]
Third decree: no more... rich people: and poor people.
From now on, we will all be the same... ummm, I dunno,
I gotta think about that...
[sung]
We'll lead as Two Kings
Ah yeah, ah yeahhhahahaha.
Ha-ha-ho-hee, ha-ha-ho-hee-ha-ha-ho-ho-ho-ho.
[spoken]
[JB:] Oh my God.
[KG:] Ahh... What?
[JB:] Dude, the red phone is flashing.
[KG:] Oh, yeah.
[JB:] Let me scoop that up. Hello? Two Kings.
[KG:] Who is it?
[JB:] What?! No! No fucking way!
[KG:] What?
[JB:] Rage, there's a potato famine in Idaho, you gotta go down there!
[KG:] Oh my God... what?
[JB:] Dude, I gotta stay here!
[KG:] Why do I have to go?
[JB:] Please! Please!
[KG:] Oh, God, okay.
[JB:] Awesome... is he gone? Alright, emergency meeting of Parliament.
All right Parliament, I know this is fucked up,
but Rage, he can't be King anymore.
Dudes, he's encroaching on my decrees!
Seriously, let's make him "Duke," a kick ass "Duke."
Or "leader formerly known as King," but-- uh-oh he's comin' back...
[sung]
We'll lead as Two Kings, oh yes
we'll really lead as Two Kings.
[spoken]
[KG:] Uh, dude?
[JB:] Rage.
[KG:] I went all over Idaho...
[JB:] Yeah?
[KG:] Uh, plenty of potatoes everywhere.
[JB:] What? There was no famine?
[KG:] Yeah, there was no famine, no.
[JB:] Dude.
[KG:] I don't know what's uh...
[JB:] A toast...
[KG:] A toast...
[JB:] Long live the "D."
[KG:] Long live the "D."
[clinking of glasses]
[JB:] Long live me. I'm sorry, I poisoned your wine.
[KG:] What?
[JB:] For the good of the land.
[KG:] You p-- I poisoned yours... huh heh, as well.
[JB/KG:] Noooooooooo!!!!!
No!
[sung]
City, city, city, city, city, city, shitty.
Shitty, city, shitty, shitty, city, city, shitty.
Hall, hall, hall, hall, hall, hall, hall, hall.
People inside me are askin' me to smoke up City Hall,
'Cause no one here is talkin'.
People inside me are askin' me to blow up City Hall,
'Cause no one here is rockin'.
People inside me are askin' me to blow up City Hall,
'Cause everyone is Rock-'em Sock-'em Robots.
Everyone is Rock-'em Sock-'em Robots.
Everyone is Rock-'em Sock-'em GO! OH!
[spoken]
[JB:] Don't, cut that part out.
[KG:] We've got it.
[JB:] Um, do you believe in God?
[KG:] I believe, I believe.
[JB:] You do?
[KG:] I believe in God. I believe in God.
[JB: (laughs)] Y'do--
[KG:] I believe in God.
[JB:] Do you?
[KG:] I believe in God.
Malibu Nights
[KG (spoken):]
Yeah, but you didn't fuckin' come out with this (one)--! [cuts off on "one"]
[KG starts playing]
[JB (spoken):] I got some lyrics.
[sung]
Malibu nights, tangerine dreams,
Malibu neighs, Malibu dreams,
Malibu, makin' a poo.
Stinky poo, lookin'd view.
Because it's time for my breakfast,
It's time for some cheese.
It's time for the stink,
time for the breeze,
time for the... hah-or-eeee!
tenacious d - classical teacher
[JB & KG]
Hey Kage
Jabels
How goes it man?
It's good, it's good
You know I've been thinkin' a lot about it
And um, I just want us to be the best fuckin' band in the world
Well, yeah, me too
I mean, there's no point in doin' it if we're not the best
Well, it's true, I agree with that
I mean what, what, we're gonna be, yeah we're really good
We're almost as good as Arcade Fire, fuck that
Yeah
We gotta leave those fuckers in the dust
What, what do you mean?
All those fuckin' youngsters gotta lick our boot or fuck it
You know what I mean?
Yeah, yeah, well how do we do that though?
Dude, you need to fuckin' have some lessons
What?!
You know you're really good, but you gotta expand your game
Lessons?
You know how Kobe, in the off-season, will go and like
Learn a fuckin', you know, a Texas-two-step or somethin'
To add to his arsenal?
Yeah, that's true, that's true
Well I've just been noticing
Some of your classic riffs are a little sloppy
Really? Huh
And I, I hope you're not pissed off at me
But I went and hired a dude
Yeah?
Yeah
Oh no, what?
Dude, just give it a chance will you?
If you don't like, hey, I swear, if you don't like it
We'll fuckin' fire his ass, he's out
Who is this guy? I've never
His name is Felix Char
Oh, what?
He's from Spain and he is the best
I got him from the fuckin' London Field S'armonic
I just, I don't know him, it seems weird, I
Would you just, will you spend a minute with him?
Okay, alright, I'll spend a minute with him
He's right outside, I'm sending him in
Oh, God, okay
Why? Lessons, so stupid
[Felix Char & KG]
Hello?
H-hi
Hello, I am Felix Char
Hi, uh, Felix, yeah, who
Is, uh, Jack has asked me to spend some time with you
Oh, yeah, okay
Uh, one on one
So, while Jack is outside, we will work on your technique
Okay
Can I see your, pickup, eh, is this your guitar here?
Yeah, I got it right, I got it
Ah, it is a Fender, huh? Is this a fender?
Oh, well, it's a Gibson
Yes, a Gibson, yes, made by the same, uh, manufacturer
Pick it up, please, can you pick it up?
Okay, yeah
No-to-to-to-to-pa-pa-pa-pa
What? What'd I do? What'd I do?
You pick it up from the neck
This is not the way you pick up a guitar
I just picked it up, I just
No no, hey hey hey hey
Quiete tu boca
You pick it up from the body, okay?
The what?
The body
Oh the body, okay, okay
I'm sorry about my accent
I didn't know, I didn't know
Now listen to me
I want to you to play like it is a woman
You go and play the guitar now, play
Uhh, okay, uhh
No no no no no
Your fingers, your fingers are too tight
They're too tight?
Yes, let me get behind you like this, you see
If I put my finger on your finger, then you can feel
What? Hey, I can play, just
Shu-shu-shu-shu-shu
Just let me play
Finger to your mouth, I put my, my finger on your mouth
On your lips, yes that's good
Hey, man, what are you?
Relax, hey, you want to play like an orgasm
I'm just try, what?
Feel this, do you feel that?
Oh God, this is really weird man
That's, that's my cock
What?!
It's my cock in your butt cheeks
Oh God, hey!
You feel it?
Ow!
Now I'm going to touch your cock, let me touch your penis
[JB & KG]
It's me, it's me
What?!
It's JB, there's no Felix dude
God, what are you doing?
There's no Felix
I'm fucking waking you up!
And trying to shake your foundations
By touching me with your penis?
Yes, by fucking touching your penis, whatever it takes
God!
That's all I'm saying, dude, I'm making a point
Let's get fucking serious, let's get fucking physical!
Alright, let's take it from the top
tenacious d - classico
Can?t you see he?s the man, let me hear you applaud
He is more than a man he's a shiny golden god.
If you think its time to fucking rock, and fucking roll, out of control,
And then you know you got to rock the block,
And fucking suck my fucking cock,
'cause when you rule, you fucking school all of the fools, out of their jewels,
'cause if you think it?s time,
If you think it?s time,
If you think it?s time to fucking rock.
He is going to kick your fucking ass,
And you know his name is kyle glass,
Rocking and fucking rolling,
And fucking rocking,
And fucking rolling,
And fucking (vocal solo)...
tenacious d - cock pushups
KG: Do you think that um, do you think that when the album, when this is out...
JB: Yeah?
KG: Do you think it will make us um, more attractive to the ladies?
JB: Pshh, yeah, in fact, I been getting ready.
KG: Yeah?
JB: Yeah, I been doin cock pushups.
KG: Cock Pushups?
JB: Yeah.
KG: What are those?
JB: Its where you fuckin lay down flat on the ground.
KG: Yeah...
JB: And then you let your boner lift you up off the ground.
KG: N...no, that's, that'd be impossible. Your cock can support your whole
weight?
JB: Well not at first...
KG: Yeah?
JB: But over time.
KG: Hmm...how many pushups can you do?
JB: ...cock pushups?
KG: Yeah...I guess, you could only do one really.
JB: Yeah, well one is all ya need
tenacious d - cosmic shame
If I were to say something to y'all tonight
I'd say set the artist free
I'm talking about the artist inside here in your hearts
Set it free!
Im saying, quit your day job
Yeah and I know a lot of you people here are saying...
"I can't quit my day job, I got kids to feed jack!"
Quit your day job!
Focus on your crafts before it's all over
Youve died, you've squandered it
You fucking robots!
Then after a couple of years
Of you focusing earnestly on your craft
Kg and I will swoop in
We will check on your progress
And we will encourage you to continue!
Or we can say stop...
Then seriously you must stop!
Or penalties will be created and inforced
Listen up!
This is the problem
Sometimes you follow your heart
Sometimes your heart cuts a fart
That's the cosmic shame
Thats the cosmic shame
And I know what you are saying now!
"what makes you so fuckin' good?!"
Well, I don't fuckin know, and I don't like it!
Ive stayed up going fuck!
Why cant everybody fucking have it?!
See, this is the thing
Some people learn it on the streets!
Some people learn it in their schools!
Me and kg we were fuckin' born with it holmes!
Lets check it out
*jack blows you away with his high voltage rock! *
That shit came of the top of my fuckin head y'all
Why?
Off the top of his head y'all
Why?
Why?!
It's the cosmic shame!
tenacious d - crazy train
Crazy Train
Crazy,but that's how it goes
Millions of people living as foes
Maybe it's not to late
To learn how to love
And forget how to hate
Mental wounds not healing
Life's a bitter shame
I'm going off the rails on a crazy train
(repeat)
I've listened to preachers
I've listened to fools
I've watched all the dropouts
Who make their own rules
One person conditioned to rule and control
The media sells it and you live the role
Mental wounds still screaming
Driving me insane
I'm going off the rails on a crazy train
(repeat)
I know that things are going wrong for me
You gotta listen to my words
Yeh-h
Heirs of a cold war
That's what we've become
Inheriting troubles I'm mentally numb
Crazy, I just cannot bear
I'm living with something that just isn't fair
Mental wounds not healing
Who and what's to blame
I'm going off the rails on a crazy train
(repeat)
tenacious d - dear penis
Dear penis
I don't think I like you anymore
You used to watch me shave
Now all you do is stare at the floor
Ohh, Dear penis
I dont like you anymore
It used to be you and me
A papertowel and a dirty magazine
That's all we needed to be getting by
Now it seems things have changed
And I think that you're the one to blame
Dear penis
I don't think I like you anymore
He sings:
Dear Rodney
I don't think I like you anymore
'Cause when you get to drinking
You put me places I've never been before
Dear Rodney
I don't like you anymore
Why can't we just get a grip
on our man to hand relationship
Come to terms truly how we feel
If we put our heads together
We just stay home forever
Dear penis I think I like you after all
Oh and Rodney
While you're shaving, shave my balls
tenacious d - destiny
Cause it's the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
you know we will be rockin' cause it's fucking insane!
It's just the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
more precious than a diamond on a platinum chain!
In Venice Beach, there was a man named Kage
When he was buskin' he was all the rage.
He met Jables and he taught him well,
all the techniques that were developed in hell.
Cock pushups and the power slide,
geek simulation now there's nowhere to hide.
They formed a band they named Tenacious D,
and then they got the Pick of Destiny.
Cause it's the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
you know we will be rockin' cause it's fucking insane!
It's just the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
our tasty grooves are better than a chicken chow mein!
Cause he who is sleazy,
is easy to pleasy.
And she who is juicy,
must be loosy-goosey.
And he who is groovy,
will be in my movie,
so come on!
The wizard and the demon had a battle royale,
the demon almost killed him with an evil kapow,
but then he broke his tooth and thus the deamon said oww.
Cause it's the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
you know we will be rockin' cause it's fucking insane!
It's just the Pick!
Of Destiny child,
you know our movie's better than the Citizen Kane!
Cause he who's a geezer,
must live in my freezer.
And she who is stockey,
is full of mularkey.
And he who is groovy,
must be in my movie,
so come on!
Oh! Cause if you're a diva,
then go to Geneva.
And if you're a carny,
then suck on my bony.
And if you are groovy,
then get in my movie!
It's called the Pick of Destiny!
The Pick of Destiny.
tenacious d - deth starr
The world is fucking turning to shit
The Earth don?t stand a chance
Hurricane Typhoon will destroy the city
We got to clean up the skies and recycle
We got to stop the over-population
But most important of all
We got to build a Deth Starr
Deth Starr it?s a fucking ship
It?s a son of a bitch, y?all
And we?re building it, it?s gonna
Take us up into the sky
We don?t need the Earth
We gonna fucking fly sky high
Deth Starr it?s a son of a bitch, y?all
Gonna take us into Outer Space
Get your shit together mother-fucker
We gonna start a new
Human race in the sky
In the sky
You know we will be rocking
On the Deth Starr
Total eclipse of the sky
Everybody going insane
Futuristic video games
Everybody have a good time
Synthesizing water to wine
But Hahhhhahaow
How?
I hired a nerd
I fucking paid a nerd
It is absurd but
I paid him to build it, ?cause
I don?t know how to build that shit
That?s right!
There?s a vacuum in space
Will fucking suck your face
Day or night
You gots to make it airtight
You gotta build that shit
Make it out-of-sight!
The fucking Deth Starr
You know we will be rocking on
The Deth Starr
It will be democratic on
The Deth Starr
There will be lots of boning
On the Starr
Having lots of sex with my friends
Dipping candle into rear-ends
Boning on a virtual plane
Fucking ?til I?m fucking insane
Ow!
(Spoken)
[Jabes:] Oh ya ya ya ya right there
[Kage:] Oh
[Jabes:] Bend over that space module
[Kage:] Oh yeah
[Jabes:] Oh zero gravity, fuck it
[Kage:] Ah yeah
[Jabes:] Hey look there?s Uranus
[Kage:] Oh that shit is tight
We got to build more Starrs
We gots to spread out far
Seven strong
We gots to bang a gong
But baby hold up now
There?s something wrong
What?s that?
That?s a fucking squid
An evil alien squid
Join up ships
We got to let it rips
We got to blow that bitch
To another dimension
Deth Starr
We gotta build a hundred of ?em
Deth Starr
We spread across the galaxy
The Deth Starr
You know we will be rocking on
The Starr
Deth Starr
We gotta build a million of ?em
Deth Starr
We spread across the galaxy
The Deth Starr
We must divide and conquer on
The Sta-aa-aarr
DETH STARR!
(Scat interlude)
So we searched the galaxy
For other forms of life
We got to drink their nutrients
To sustain our quality of life
So we scoop up the creatures
Then we put them in a geodesic dome
But the questions arises, my friend
What have we become?
DETH STARR!
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