fucked up years

Grace Vanderwaal

It don t speak loud, tape it s mouth
Killed by lightning
What happened to my home?
On my own, teeth are grinding
Plain sight, hiding

And I m going to clubs trying out drugs
Doing too much, counting the nugs
But it stays right there, fucked up years
And when I run, like glue it comes
A shadow that s not my own
It stays right there, won t disappear

Try to find my out
Used to be fearless but now I m worried
That all along, well, it wasn t the home
Wasn t the family, wasn t the shit town
It was always me

And I m going to clubs trying out drugs
Doing too much, counting the nugs
But it stays right there, fucked up years
And when I run, like glue it comes
A shadow that s not my own
It stays right there, won t disappear

Disapp?ar, disappear
Disappear, disappear

And I m st?aling identities
That I was running from my past
But I was trying to run from it
So what do I do now
That I was running to the future
But the fucked up past is me somehow
Me somehow, me someh?

And I m going to clubs trying out drugs
Doing too much, counting the nugs
But it stays right there, my fucked up years
And when I run, like glue it comes
A shadow that s not my own
It stays right there, won t disappear
So I ll just stay right here, it all just stays so near
So I ll just disappear

Disappear, disappear
Fucked up years, fucked up years